“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it” – Charles Swindall

Have you ever done something negative because some one else did something negative. Then when it all comes out the old saying of “two wrongs don’t make a right” shows it’s meaning and you have a ah ha moment. 

When you realize what you did and realize there is no time machine.. When you have an idea of what the turning point was and you realize there is no time machine. No magical wand that can make it all go away. If you are a fantasy science fiction fan like I am that reality SUCKS. But alas you can not change the past only learn from it. Sometimes you think the initial teaching is to protect yourself. Because it wasn’t actually what you learned it was just the panic mode button pushed. 

I am guilty of not talking about my feelings. I second guess every word coming out of my mouth because I am not confident that I truly said what I wanted. That I didn’t word my words correctly. I will have one thought in my head that sounds perfect. That’s the phrase i should say and then i talk and that phrase didn’t come out. Something completely different came out. Something that made NO DAMN sense. So then the next time you talk you take longer to respond because your thinking to much.  When your thinking to much, you develop worse case scenarios. Worse case scenarios are just that the absolute worse case. Sometimes I am glad I have that thought process in ways it allows me to know how I handle a bad thing without panicking. Other times I have now thought of something that WILL never happen and in turn hurt myself more then I needed to because I thought to much. 

Talking makes you feel better, it does. I had a moment today where yesterday I thought about a situation to much without talking about it and today I after being in my head talked about it in the open. I said everything there is nothing else in there now lol. I feel better that I have now let it out and admitted my worries. Now i believe I can move forward.

I have listened to my evil angel a little to much and ignored the good one because of fear of loosing what means the most to me. Lets face it evil angel has her way of making you think of a excuses that “make perfect sense” and in the moment everything ok! Well she is being fired. 

The past can’t go away and you can’t forget it. I want to work past it and it may be hard and take time but it’s what my heart wants to do. I believe in listening to your heart. For those that say “your heart can be wrong” then maybe you didn’t actually hear what it said.

I have made up my mind, I know what I want for my life and will do what I have to to keep it.